Touching letter to father of female DNU student makes many people cry

“I thank you, Dad, for all the sweat and tears you have shed to provide food and clothing, to raise my siblings and me to be like others, and for never complaining. I am so heartless, aren’t I, Dad? I have not paid attention to your thoughts and feelings. I have never even opened my mouth to say to you, “I love you, Dad, I love you so much!”…”

It seems that the older children get, the more distant they become from their parents. Hugs, kisses, and loving words of thanks to their parents become less and less frequent and difficult to say. Many young people, although they love their parents very much, cannot express it in words. The words “I love you, Dad, I love you, Mom…” become awkward and stuck in their throats. Not sharing and not expressing feelings unintentionally cause the distance between parents and children to grow.

The ancients said: "Of the hundred good deeds, filial piety is the first ." Of the 14 commandments of Buddha, unfilial piety is the greatest sin in human life. Filial piety is the foundation of morality. In the family, filial piety is the foundation for building happiness. Recognizing the importance of filial piety education for students, the Department of Soft Skills, Dai Nam University has included this content in the soft skills curriculum.

Emotional Quotient (EQ) determines the success of each person. In a soft skills class for K12 students, Master Pham Van Minh - Head of Soft Skills Department, Dean of Business Administration Faculty, Deputy Head of Training Department of Dai Nam University gave the topic: "With your EQ, write a letter of thanks to your father and mother - the people who gave birth to you".

Immediately after reading the assignment, many students reacted that the requirements were too corny, parents are seen every day, why do they have to write letters and share their feelings. However, when grading the papers, the lecturers of the Soft Skills Department were extremely surprised and could not hold back their tears at the students’ stories. Many pages of letters were blurred with tears – the tears of the letter writer and the letter reader.

We would like to publish the original letter to her father from a female student of Grade 12 at Dai Nam University (who requested to remain anonymous). These are secret feelings, boundless love but never once expressed out loud "I love you, dad, I care for you..."

MSc. Pham Van Minh shared the letters to the students' parents on his personal page.

Dear Dad!

This is the first time I have written a complete letter to you. As I write this letter, memories keep flooding back to me. I recall my childhood with stories, memories I will never forget, happy moments in my parents' arms.

In this life, I realize that I am truly lucky and happy to have my parents by my side to protect me. No matter how difficult life is, I still feel so happy.

In my childhood memories, my father was always a very strict and difficult person with harsh, old-fashioned thoughts. Those thoughts always haunted me and many times I felt jealous of my friends who had a father who was always cheerful, gentle and indulgent. My father never took us out, never bought me a toy that I liked. My father always thought that those things were not important, expensive. But you know, those are all hobbies, of children and me too.

Dad never shows his feelings to the outside world, so sometimes I naively think that Dad doesn't love me, doesn't care about me, doesn't understand me. When I do something wrong, Dad often scolds me, not giving me a chance to explain.

I still remember one time when Uncle Thu came to visit my house, Dad was not home. Uncle bought me a lot of toys that I liked, took me out to play, then took me to his house to stay with Hieu for a week. You know, Dad, this was the first time I had been able to go out and have fun like that, to get to know the world of funny children. But after only 3 days at Uncle's house, Dad came home and found out what happened, so he immediately came to pick me up. When I got home, Dad scolded me and beat me because I went to Uncle's house without asking for Dad's permission. Dad scolded me that girls are not allowed to go to other people's houses to live. I was so scared that I just burst into tears, feeling resentful and not daring to say a word.

Dad, you know, at that time I was very upset and hurt. Only 1 or 2 days at my uncle's house but I felt a truly happy and warm family - something I always dreamed of. Hieu's father was always gentle, hugged and pampered him, bought him all the toys he liked. But during the days at my uncle's house, I was really not happy, Dad. I cried, cried because I didn't have my father's care and understanding.

I also know that Dad has treated Mom badly. When Mom and Dad argued and fought, I couldn't do anything. I could only cry, be scared and hurt deep inside. I was scared! Afraid of Dad's words, afraid of domestic violence. Dad's beatings didn't hurt me, it was Dad's harsh words that hurt me.

The lines of confidences sent to dad made the teachers who graded the papers unable to hold back their tears.

Just like that, the older I got, the less I dared to approach my father, the less I dared to talk to him, and the more I avoided him. During meals, no one said a word to anyone, I just sat quietly looking at my father, holding the bowl of rice but unable to swallow. I didn't dare to cry, didn't dare to be angry with my father for fear of him getting angry.

In those days, I was really depressed, I didn't want to go out and meet anyone because I was afraid of seeing people's eyes, afraid of seeing families filled with laughter and feeling sorry for myself. At that time, I asked myself: Why did my parents give birth to me? Why couldn't they be patient for us? I don't need to be rich and wealthy like other families, I just wish for a warm, happy family, always happily gathered together.

Many times I want to ask Dad, why do you take all your anger from society and vent it on Mom? Why do you have to torture yourself like that? The more you do that, the more I love you, rather than being angry with you, you know?

Dad always taught me that in order to live in this world, first of all, I must be filial, have a good moral conscience, and have the will to succeed. Dad often told me: “Don’t blame me for not being as rich as others so that you can be happier, but I will not let you suffer. You will never understand my thoughts. When you grow up and become a parent, you will know how much I love you. But by the time you understand, I will no longer be in this world.”

Now that I have grown up, entered college, and started a life away from home and my parents, I can feel more clearly how much love my father has for me. He always calls me, makes me eat well, and watches over me like a little child. He never lets me lack anything.

The older I get, the more I feel that even though you don't say it, you do everything for me. Although there are times when your hot temper makes me unhappy, I feel that all those things are not as important as having you.

I thank you, Dad, for all the sweat and tears you shed to provide food and clothing for us to study, and you never complained. I am so heartless, aren’t I, Dad? I didn’t pay attention to your thoughts and feelings. I have never even opened my mouth to say to you, “I love you, Dad, I love you so much!”

The kindness of my father is as great as the sky and the sea. In this whole life, I will probably never be able to repay him.

Dear Dad! I am writing these lines but most likely I will never send them. Time will pass, and these lines will fade with the years. But Dad, my love for you is forever. I am not sure if I will be better, but I can only promise you that I will try my best to be better every day, so as not to disappoint your expectations.

Thank you so much dad, thank you for always being by my side. Please give us a chance to repay your love. Please promise to live a long life with us dad! I really want to tell you: I love you!

My daughter!